On June 15, 2015, one day before Trump officially announced his candidacy for president, I told a former student of mine who had been hyping Trump on his FB wall, “Nick, you lower yourself every single time you post about this sleazeball. Every. Single. Time.”

From that time I have watched with a mix of impressed fascination and (increasing) horror as Trump first systematically crushed the GOP and then humbled Hillary and the vaunted Clinton machine to finally ascend to the White House.

All that time I have been anything but subtle about my personal disgust towards Donald Trump and my opposition to his candidacy. I have regarded him as a dangerous fascist and said so clearly and often. I have been as vocal in this matter as I have ever been on any political issue. #NeverTrump #NeverEverTrump

And yet, here we are. Trump has won. He has won it all.

His victory is galling on so many levels.

I have to accept that this pompous creep who gloats in his status as the ultimate “winner” is now actually the ultimate winner, when I wanted so badly to watch him lose–spectacularly.

I will have to endure that stupid name as it is constantly forced on me for at least four more years, when I was so looking forward to never hearing it again. (Ugh, I’m so sick of that boorishly-slathered-in-GIANT-GOLD-LETTERS-on-everything-from-frozen-steaks-to-crappy-timeshares name. Trump. TrumpTrumpTrump.)

In my mind’s eye, I can see him taking possession of the most honored prizes of our republic–the Oval Office, “Hail to the Chief”, Air Force One, the White House–his face split with that insufferable grin as he waltzes in–rocking the ultimate high, as he trades in his fake gilded mansions for the furniture of Real Power.

And yet, here we are.

Donald J. Trump
President of the United States
Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces
Chief Executive of the Federal Government
Keeper of the Nuclear Codes

Here we are indeed.

I’m writing this morning to close the cycle on what has passed, and set my perspective for what is to come.

For the Trump that was is not the Trump that is. He has ascended. He is no more the crafty-but-fake self-promoting master of a “brand”. He’s the President. He’s OUR President. He’s my President.

And the office of the President is something special in history. It’s easily the most powerful office that has ever existed, and it is taken on not by might of conquest, but by freely-given grant of the people of this nation.

We have a process; we have rules; and we choose. If we choose badly, the fault lies with us, but the honor is the same.

And so this morning I am formally setting aside my former unconditional opposition to Donald J. Trump. He is no longer my opponent. He is to become my representative–my President. In his successes I will enjoy success; in his failures I will suffer. We all will suffer. And so I wish him success.

Our deeply-divided nation desperately needs to again be a place where the poles listen to one another, where they identify and work together towards common goals, where a moderate middle can thrive. And though the GOP has been unforgivably oppositional towards (and disrespectful) of Barack Obama, I will not commit the same fault. I will support the president and wish him godspeed and good success insofar as I am able. And even in opposition I will show him the respect and honor that the office (if not the man) deserves.

Of course I’m not a simpleton. I don’t trust Donald Trump. I will–we all need to–watch him carefully, and when he abuses the trust that has been committed to him, we should be strong in our opposition.

But my severest opposition will be undertaken only at need, and with a heavy heart.

As a child of white upper-middle-class conservatism who came of age in the 90s, I learned early how to disrespect and bitterly oppose a president–how to rejoice in his failures, how to despise him as a person, how to scorch the earth.

It did me no good, and that impulse more widely carried out did our nation no good. The Right’s uncompromising, no-holds-barred opposition to President Clinton did terrible damage to the political cohesion of this nation.

I will not make the same mistake again.

My hope is that President Trump will delegate much and wisely, that he will surround himself with good advisors who will help him muzzle his worst instincts, that having won the contest, he will now rebrand himself (as he is so adept at doing) as the champion for all the people–not just the angry white ones.

There were some hopeful glimmers of such a direction in his victory speech last night–words unlike any I recall hearing from him before:

“Hillary has worked very long and very hard over a long period of time, and we owe her a major debt of gratitude for her service to our country. I mean that very sincerely.

Now it’s time for America to bind the wounds of division . . . to get together. To all Republicans and Democrats and independents across this nation, I say it is time for us to come together as one united people. It’s time. I pledge to every citizen of our land that I will be president for all Americans, and this is so important to me. For those who have chosen not to support me in the past . . . I’m reaching out to you for your guidance and your help so that we can work together and unify our great country.”

This impulse towards and commitment to unity is part of what it means to live in a diverse community. I hate abortion. I thought states should be given space to decide for themselves on gay marriage. I can’t stand big oil, and fracking, and Monsanto, and the corporate lobbies. I despise our unlimited warmongering. I can’t stand our overspending. I oppose the current approach towards transgender issues.

But I’m just one voice, and there are many of my countrymen who support these things. I must–and do–respect their voices. I speak Truth as I see it (each of us should), but I don’t own the outcome (none of us do).

And this I know:

The American system, with all its faults–its corruption and corporatist strangleholds, its ignorant populace–is by far the best hope we as a planet have to peacefully and successfully face the political, environmental, and cultural challenges ahead.

China? Russia? The Middle East?

They don’t care about equality and the environment or respect for dissent.

And so though it is gravely fractured and much corrupted, I will work within our system in a way that supports it and heals it, not in a way that eats it from within.

Next election I’ll try again, and in the meantime I’ll keep on seeking and speaking the Truth in a way that makes space for as many perspectives as possible and brings us together as One People.